Author Archives: Frost

Heads Up, Venue Owners in South Africa

Hi there, I play in a band, and I have a large, ugly bone to pick with venue owners in South Africa. Before I get started, let me clarify: this isn’t directed at any one venue owner in particular, but rather as a general warning to the state of the industry in SA – sparked by a number of incidents that I have heard of in the past. Okay, so lets get started.

  • First things first: if you want a DJ, hire a DJ. If you want a band, hire a band. If you want both, hire both; but don’t – for the love of God – hire a band and expect them to supply in-between set  ambience. That’s the venue’s issue. Do you hire a DJ and ask them to play in a band as well?  No. If you’re confused as to the difference between a band and a DJ, then you shouldn’t be running a venue in the first place. Go back to fishing.
  • Don’t try underpay us. We don’t care if the bar didn’t make enough money; that isn’t our problem. The bar is yours, the band is ours. If you hire a band at a fixed rate, be prepared to pay it. If you’re going to tell us afterwards that we are only getting half-pay, you are being completely unreasonable. If you tell us during our set, know that we will only play half a set.
  • Following from the previous point, if you are going to undercut us at the end of the night, we’d rather have a door deal, where we get paid according to money made from entrance charges. That way, if we don’t attract enough people to your venue, we don’t get paid. But don’t negotiate a set fee, and then tell us that there weren’t enough people attending. That’s not our problem.
  • Yes, playing music is a passion and a hobby, but for some/most of us it’s a job too. Don’t act like you’re doing us a favour by “letting” us play at your venue. We are like any other working professional; maybe we don’t have degrees or qualifications (some of us do) to prove it, but what we do requires dedication, hard work and, possibly the most tedious job in the world: dealing with you.
  • Don’t hire two acoustic guitarists if you’re expecting a trance party. It’s Tuesday night for God’s sake.
  • No matter how many times you tell us I don’t want to be unfair / I’m not using you guys / I’m not trying to be a bad guy, the bottom line is, if you are not upholding the initial agreement – YOU ARE BEING A BASTARD.
  • Contrary to popular belief, we are not stupid. We may not be rocket scientists but we can perform basic addition, multiplication, subtraction and division. Translation: we know if you’re undercutting us.
  • Don’t be skimp; we have expenses. We don’t just evaporate out of your venue when we’ve finished, only to apparate back a week later, all smiles and pansies. We carry large, heavy equipment, deal with advanced electronics and are kept awake until all hours of the night in an effort to entertain YOU and YOUR guests.

To the bands out there. Don’t be fools. Use a contract. A simple booking agreement contract will prevent these things from ever happening to you. Without one, you will be left enraged, powerless… and broke. If you want a booking agreement template and don’t know where to find one, you can download the template I use HERE. Go well, and thanks for listening.

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Filed under Ramblings, The Chronicles

Some Synergy Sin

So we arrived at Synergy Live 2010 on day two of the festival – a fatal mistake for any live music festival goer. One has to take the necessary time to acclimatise and adjust to the surroundings at an event like this: Campsite here. Bathrooms there. Food here. Giant Frankenstein Monster blow-up there. We missed out on the advantages inherent in attending a festival from day one and as a result, had no idea what the f**k we were doing.

Synergy Live 2010

After staring stupidly out of the back seat of a car while Kyle coerced two gate attendants into giving us a media pass, we were directed towards – what we believed to be – our campsite. As it turns out, there’s a whole lot of wine farm at Boschendal Estate; the fact that we were lost was not only becoming increasingly obvious, it was also completely amazing, considering that there was an outdoor music festival somewhere in our immediate vicinity.

Synergy Live 2010

We eventually found our camping spot: a spacious, shaded area that was – at first, startling for a group of people who are used to the dry, thorny plateau of RAMfest. We set up the tent, and proceeded to get cracking on the booze. This was followed by a hurried drive down to the YourLMG Tent, where Heldervue were getting their jam on.

Synergy Live 2010

We caught the tale-end of their set – which was golden, as always – and headed to the bar. Next up was CT rockers, Fox Comet – who I had never seen before; I was well impressed. After a much needed meeting with the Captain, I took a look around the grounds a little to see the lay-of-the-land. Synergy was big. Big in the best kind of way. The three separate music stages were well positioned, each offering their own unique blend of South African music. We eventually made our way down to the main stage to see the Hogs’ set. Mind blown.

Synergy Live 2010

I’m the kind of festival goer that prefers to stand back and actually watch a band play, as apposed to being directly involved in a moshpit – or even moving my body in any way that is not necessary. I just like it that way. Needless to say, I didn’t actually watch a lot of the bands that played on Saturday as we spent most of our time investigating various attractions littered around the grounds. Wacky-waving-inflatable-arm-flailing-tube-man!

Synergy Live 2010

And then night time just happened. I think I experienced Saturday night in much the same way as everyone else: blinding lights. Spinning ride thing. Drink. Pizza. Drink. Walk around trying to find people. Smoke. Drink. Climb a tree. Fall. Drink. People in neon shirts on mushrooms. Shouting. And then Feeder, the headlining act. A band that is highly underrated. After playing songs that I had known for years – despite not knowing their origin, Feeder left the stage and the crowd dispersed. Oh, and the Nutella crêpes. Did I mention those?

Synergy Live 2010

We awoke the next morning to the sound of Tecla frantically calling: “Kyle! Kyooooooooole!”. What followed was a post-party chill-out session in the VIP campsite, where we listened to relaxed acoustic songs and complained at length about our hangovers. A perfect end to the weekend, accentuated by another round of crêpes courtesy of Jono. What a guy.

Synergy Live 2010

Until next year Synergy!

Synergy Live 2010

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Jesse Beth for FHM Models 2011

FHM Modelbook is an FHM social networking initiative catering specifically for aspiring models as well as models who are already relatively established within the South African modeling industry. Modelbook annually host a competition in which readers and web-users are encouraged to vote for their favourite model with the intent of getting them into the top 10 most popular category, after which they will enter a final voting phase. The competition will conclude at an exclusive FHM party event, sponsored by Tabasco, that will take place soon after voting closes on the 28th February 2011. Winners of the FHM Models 2011 competition will win a R20 000 cash prize, a professional FHM photoshoot and the reverence and respect of the extensive and influential FHM fanbase.

FHM Models 2011

My gorgeous woman, Jesse Beth, is taking part in FHM Models 2011 and I, after deep thought, have decided that my enthusiasm to see my girlfriend within the pages of the esteemed FHM – inside the glossy temple from which every major swimsuit model from SA was borne – far out-ways my inevitable onslaught of insecurities when I realise that every warm-blooded male in the country is going to be ogling  my semi-naked girlfriend. Consider this the ultimate display of national bro-mans’hip.

Jesse is signed to Trigger Modeling Agency in Cape Town and has been involved in a number of creative projects; from professional photoshoots to public service announcements. She recently made an appearance in the debut music video entitled ‘Evolve’ from Somerset West rockers, Heldervue.

I urge you to take a chance to vote for her. The reason why you should vote for her is twofold: 1. because she is dramastically (dramatically/drastically) beautiful and 2. because if you vote, you stand a chance to attend the exclusive FHM after party sponsored by Tabasco.

So how do you vote? There are two methods.

You can visit Jesse’s Modelbook profile and click the ‘please vote for me’ button located at the top right of the page. Alternatively you can SMS ‘MODEL 84’ to 34973 to submit a vote for Jesse. See you at the party?

FHM Models 2011

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Rouxmia Bougas on the FHM Calendar 2010

Somerset Westling, Rouxmia Bougas, talks about her career as a model, as well as her aspirations as an author and novelist. And then of course, she stands ankle-deep in the ocean wearing very little, and has photos taken of her. Hot. This is the 2010 FHM Calendar shoot. Enjoy!

For more about Rouxmia:

Rouxmia

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Facebook Faux Pas #2

Here are some more delightfully humorous local Facebook mishaps. Posting things on the internet leaves a lasting trail; this is where we celebrate that disadvantage. Enjoy!

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Filed under Faux Pas, Pictures

WØLFÅLLEY Airs Off

If you live in or around the Stellenbosch/Somerset West/Cape Town vicinity, you may have heard hushed whispers of late, regarding a certain WØLFÅLLEY entity. Here’s the deal.

WØLFÅLLEY are a Cape Town based lifestyle brand that aim to showcase popular, yet under-exposed elements of South African youth culture via the web and various other mediums. Their mission is to conceptualize and host unique events and artistic productions showcasing unique aspects of each form (sport, art, music etc).

Which brings me to my next point and thus, the crux of this article:

WØlfÅLLEY

This Saturday (tomorrow – 11th September) hordes will be making their way to Strand beach in- you guessed it- Strand, to witness a sporting event, the likes of which this town has never seen.

Surfers participating in the event will take part in two-man head-2-head heats. They will be towed into waves and will be judged on their single biggest/best/most stylish move attempted in each heat. The highest single score proceeds to the next round, where it all starts again. For this event only strapless surfboards will be allowed for use to compete in the event. Nationally, this will be the first event of its kind.

Not only that, the after party will be held at Die Mystic Boer in Stellies featuring up-and-coming local artists LA VI, Somerset West heroes, The Black Market Riots andDrum & Bass acts Fletcher and Psydstep.

What better way could you ever hope to spend your Saturday? See you there!

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Filed under Reviews, The Chronicles, Videos

Facebook Faux Pas

Every now and then someone comes along who posts something on Facebook, whether intentionally or accidentally, that provides us (or maybe just me) with a laugh for the day. Don’t get me wrong, these people are my friends, and who better to make me laugh than my friends; the following snaps aren’t meant to try and belittle anyone or to point and make fun.

Over the past months I have screen-shot a few Facebook statii that I thought stood out amongst the rest. Kudos to anyone who can guess who said what?

If you’ve spotted any funny Flacidbook statuses and would like to submit them to The Wild West, just drop me a mail with your pictures attached and the subject line: Fackbook.


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Filed under Faux Pas, Pictures